‘Vitalsexuals’ following the path to a healthy sex life in later years“Vitalsexual” is the latest fad word in Europe. The “vitalsexual male” is considered to be a “new type” of man aged 40 and over who considers a healthy sex life to be very important, cares about the sexual satisfaction of his partners and is not afraid to search out a solution for erectile dysfunction, should it occur.
According to a recent survey by Bayer HealthCare on 8,500 men over 40 from 12 nations including Korea, Canada, France, Mexico, Taiwan and Brazil, only 26 percent of middle aged Korean men think of themselves as vitalsexual ― the lowest number. The figure was well below the average for Asia-Pacific nations, which was 46 percent; the proportion was highest in Taiwan, at 63 percent. Then, what do Korean middle-aged men need in order to be vitalsexuals?
In the survey, about 70 percent of Korean men said that stress had the biggest effect on lowering sexual desire, while a smaller percentage worried too much about the possible dissatisfaction of partners.
“If a man suffers from stress or develops an obsession, the autonomic nervous system actually becomes depressed and the interest and desire for sex drops,” said Kim Se-hong, a family doctor of St. Mary’s Hospital in Yeouido. “That drops sexual satisfaction dramatically and also can become the cause of erectile dysfunction.” Dr. Kim also said that a man who thinks his penis is too small could also suffer from obsessive behavior. “But, in most cases size doesn’t matter with regard to a man’s love life,” he added.
Men who suffer from mental problems, such as stress or obsessive-compulsive disorder, can get help from counseling and medicinal therapy, though doctors say it’s more effective if a couple get treatment together.
Second, it’s bad to compare one’s sex life with that of others. It’s nonsense that middle-aged men compare the number of times they make love with others, experts note, adding that the number of times that a couple agree to have sex is usually the best, considering each other’s age, health condition and stamina.
“Never set a monthly target number for having sex when in your 40s and 50s after merely listening to others,” said Kim Se-chul, a urologist at Chung-ang University Medical Center. “A man could suffer from erectile dysfunction if he doesn’t consider his own age and sexual ability, or becomes overly greedy,” he advised. Dr. Kim said that if erectile dysfunction occurs or sexual desire drops dramatically, it’s better to get a medical check up as, for example, testosterone levels may have fallen.
It takes time to gain another erection after semen has been discharged, and this differs depending on age. It could take less than a minute for men in their 20s, tens of minutes for those in their 40s, hours for those in their 50s and even a few days for those over 65 years old. And most importantly, they are medically “normal.”
Men are usually sexually driven by visual excitement, while women are sensitive to hearing. It’s more important to tell your partner things such as “You’re beautiful” or “I love you,” to increase her sexual satisfaction while having sex. Then, the partner will feel more intimacy.
Sex is not one person’s problem ― partners should talk to each other in order to understand what the problem is and to solve it together.
According to the survey, Korean middle-aged men weren’t considerate enough to their partners compared to those of other nations.
“The sexual satisfaction is deeply related to the intimacy or romantic relationship level between partners,” said Kim Hyeong-joo, a urologist at Hangang Sacred Heart Hospital. “The relationship a man has with his partner affects the erectile function.” He added that if the man’s relationship with his partner was good on all levels, the medical treatment for erectile dysfunction was much more effective.
According to another survey, the prevalence rate for erectile dysfunction is 8 percent in Korean men aged over 40, while the figure is 4 percent in China, Taiwan and Malaysia.
“Many middle-aged Korean men don’t get medical care thinking that the erectile dysfunction is a natural occurrence of aging, even though they still consider their sexual life important,” said Lee Sang-il, a urologist at Myongji Hospital. “It’s the problem of Korean men not considering erectile dysfunction as an illness that needs treatment.”
Erectile dysfunction can be cured in more than 90 percent of all cases with drugs or an operation. Only 10 percent of Korean men who are suffering from the symptom take Viagra, Cialis or Levitra.
In the survey by Bayer HealthCare, vitalsexuals had a stronger desire to cure erectile dysfunction, compared to non-vitalsexuals. Three quarters of western vitalsexual men said they would take drugs, while 100 percent of Korean vitalsexuals said so ― even though the number of those who really do so is estimated to be very small.
by Park Tae-kyun