헌혈

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헌혈

성인의 몸속에는 약 5L의 피가 돌고 있다. 혈액은 산소와 영양분을 운반하고 노폐물을 실어나른다. 인공심장까지 개발한 현대의학도 완벽한 인공혈액은 성공시키지 못했다. 산소를 실어나르는 대체혈액은 고혈압•신부전증 등 부작용이 심각하다. 노폐물을 운반하고 면역까지 맡는 인공혈액은 아직 엄두조차 못 내고 있다. 수혈 환자들은 여전히 보존기간이 3주, 길어도 35일을 넘기지 못하는 헌혈에 목을 매고 있다.

내가 한 영작
Modern medicine, which ⓐsucceeded in developing an artificial heart, has not yet been able to create the perfect artificial blood. Artificial blood that carries oxygen produces serious side effects such as high blood pressure. We cannot even receive artificial blood ⓑthat carries ⓒwastes and immunity. People who need a blood transfusion ⓓstill desires eagerly for blood ⓔdonation. However, blood only can be preserved three weeks, on average, and never more than 35 days.

ⓐ succeeded has succeeded 현재에도 인공심장이 개발되어 사용되고 있는 상태이므로 현재완료형으로 수정
ⓑ that  which 사람 이외의 사물을 받은 관계사는 기본적으로 which 사용
ⓒ wastes  waste 노폐물은 셀 수 없는 명사이므로 s 삭제
ⓓ still desires eagerly  have to anxiously wait desire는 욕구, 욕망을 나타내는 단어
ⓔ donation  to be donated ⓓ에서 desire를 wait를 고쳐서 for blood가 의미상의 주어가 되면서 donation 대신 to 부정사가 사용된 것임

After proofreading
Modern medicine, which has succeeded in developing an artificial heart, has not yet been able to create the perfect artificial blood. Artificial blood that carries oxygen produces serious side effects, such as high blood pressure. We cannot receive artificial blood which carries waste and immunity. People who need a blood transfusion have to anxiously wait for blood to be donated. However, blood only can be preserved three weeks, on average, and never more than 35 days.


만성적인 혈액 부족에 시달리는 겨울철이 돌아왔다. 지난해 전체 헌혈자 중 학생이 48.3%, 군인이 20.1%를 차지했다. 방학 때마다 혈액 가뭄이 반복되고 있다. 혈액관리본부는 “현재 혈액 확보량은 O형이 1.7일, 전체 평균이 2.2일로 적정 재고량 7일치에 크게 못 미친다”고 밝혔다.

내가 한 영작
Whenever winter comes, we are plagued by chronic blood ⓐshortage. Last year, students and soldiers accounted for 48.3 percent and 20.1 percent, respectively, of all blood ⓑdonators. Whenever the vacation period comes, the blood shortages occur again.
The government authority for blood management ⓒannounced that the current ⓓblood reserve are below the standard, a seven-day supply. The supply of ⓔO-type blood is 1.7 days, and the overall average is 2.2 days.
.
ⓐ shortage  shortages 여러 사례를 나타내는 것이므로 복수형을 사용
ⓑ donators  donors ‘기증자’를 나타내는 어휘는 ‘donor’임
ⓒ announced  announced recently 발표된 시점이 최근임을 나타내기 위해 recently 추가
ⓓ blood reserve  reserves of blood 여러 곳에 저장하고 있으므로 복수형을 사용
ⓔ O-type  Type O 영어에 자연스러운 표현으로 수정

After proofreading
Whenever winter comes, we are plagued by chronic blood shortages. Last year, students and soldiers accounted for 48.3 percent and 20.1 percent, respectively, of all blood donors. Whenever the vacation period comes, the blood shortages occur again.
The government authority for blood management announced recently that the current reserves of blood are below the standard, a seven-day supply. The supply of Type O blood is 1.7 days, and the overall average is 2.2 days.

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