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북송(北宋·960~1126) 때 개혁정치를 펼쳤던 인물 중 하나가 범중엄(范仲淹)이다. 어려서 부친을 여의고 어머니가 개가하는 상황을 맞았던 그는 집을 떠나 절에서 힘겨운 배움길에 들어선다. 가난했던 그는 죽을 끓여 식힌 뒤 네 조각으로 나눠 차가운 죽 두 덩어리로 하루의 끼니를 때웠다. 이른바 죽을 나눈다라는 뜻의 ‘획죽(劃粥)’이라는 고사 속 주인공이다.

내가 한 영작
Fan Zhongyang was a politician ⓐof Northern Sung, in China, and one of ⓑreformists ⓒat that time. His father died when he was young and his mother quickly remarried. ⓓHe left home and went through all types of difficulties to receive an educated at a temple. As he was extremely poor, Fan made porridge, cooled it down, then divided the cold lumps into four portions. He ate two portions a day. Fan Zhongyang is the main figure of the Chinese anecdote titled “dividing porridge.”

JoongAng Daily 에디터가 수정한 문장
Fan Zhongyang was a politician from Northern Sung, in China, and one of the reformists of that time. His father died when he was young and his mother quickly remarried. Fan left home and went through all types of difficulties to receive an education at a temple. As he was extremely poor, Fan made porridge, cooled it down, then divided the cold lumps into four portions. He ate two portions a day. Fan Zhongyang is the main figure of the Chinese anecdote titled “Dividing Porridge.”

Writing Tip
ⓐof → from ‘출신, 출처’를 나타내는 전치사 ‘from’으로 수정. 참고로 전치사 ‘of’는 ‘소속’을 나타낼 때 사용
ⓑreformists → the reformists 북송 때 활동하였던 개혁가를 구체적으로 나타내고 있으므로 정관사 ‘the’삽입
ⓒat that time → of that time 문맥상 ‘그 당시에 활동했던 개혁가’로 해석되어 ‘reformists’를 꾸며주고 있으므로 ‘of that time’으로 수정. 참고로 ‘at that time’은 ‘그 당시에’의 의미로 부사적 용법으로 서술어를 수식함
ⓓHe → Fan 의미를 명확히 하기 위해 ‘Fan’으로 수정

정쟁에 말려 지방 벼슬아치로 좌천된 그에게 어느 날 하루 친구로부터 편지가 날아든다. 명승지로 유명한 악양루(岳陽樓)를 수리했으니 글을 지어 달라는 부탁이었다. 장강(長江)가에 있어 경치가 매우 빼어난 이 누각을 위해 지은 그의 글 ‘악양루기(岳陽樓記)’는 지금까지 명문 중의 명문으로 전해진다.

내가 한 영작
Later, he was dragged into a political struggle and ⓐdegraded to a low-ranking ⓑofficial outside the capital. Then one day, Fan received a letter from a friend. His friend wrote that the Yueyang Tower, a building with ⓒstunning view by the Yangtze River, was being renovated and asked ⓓFan to write notes on the famous building. He wrote “Yueyang Lou Ji”, or “Notes on the Yueyang Tower,” which is now regarded as one of the classics.

JoongAng Daily 에디터가 수정한 문장
Later, he was dragged into a political struggle and demoted to a lower-ranking position outside the capital. Then one day, Fan received a letter from a friend. His friend wrote that the Yueyang Tower, a building with a stunning view by the Yangtze River, was being renovated and asked him to write notes on the famous building. He wrote “Yueyang Lou Ji,” or “Notes on the Yueyang Tower,” which is now regarded as one of the classics.

Writing Tip
ⓐdegraded → demoted ‘계급이나 지위를 떨어뜨리다’는 의미의 ‘demote’로 수정. 참고로 ‘degrade’는 ‘품위, 질, 평판 등을 떨어뜨리다’는 의미로 사용
ⓑofficial → position 문맥상 ‘낮은 지위’를 나타내고 있으므로, 지위를 나타내는 ‘position’으로 수정
ⓒstunning view → a stunning view 누각에서 보이는 풍경 중에 하나를 이야기하고 있으므로 부정관사 ‘a’ 삽입
ⓓFan → him 이미 앞에 언급된 이름이므로 중복을 피하기 위해 대명사로 수정
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