가짜 생명수
설화나 민담에서 생명을 살리는 물질로 흔히 등장하는 게 물이다. 바로 생명수(生命水)다. 물이 세상 만물의 원천이요, 인간 생명의 근원인 것과 무관치 않을 터다. 오구굿에 사용되는 무가(巫歌) ‘바리공주 설화’만 해도 그렇다. 오구대왕의 일곱째 딸로 태어나 버려졌던 바리가 아버지의 병을 낫게 하기 위해 구해 온 게 바로 서천서역국(西天西域國)에 있는 생명수다. 생명수는 이미 죽어버린 오구대왕의 뼈와 살에 숨을 불어넣는 기적을 일으킨다.내가 한 영작
Water often appears as a life-giving substance in folktales ⓐor old fables. That is probably because water is the source of everything in the world ⓑand human life. ⓒSuch water appears in “The Tale of Princess Bari,” a song in ogu-gut, ⓓKorean traditional shamanistic ritual of purification. When Bari was born she was abandoned by his father King Ogu who already had six princesses and hoped for a son. Later as the king became seriously ill, the abandoned princess went to the Hell and brought life-giving water to his father. This water worked a miracle, giving life back to the already dead bones and flesh of the king.
JoongAng Daily 에디터가 수정한 문장
Water often appears as a life-giving substance in folktales. That is probably because water is the source of everything in the world, including human life.
Water takes an important role in “The Tale of Princess Bari,” a song in ogu-gut, the traditional Korean shamanistic ritual of purification. Bari is born as the seventh daughter to the chauvinistic King Ogu, who had hoped for a son. Disappointed by yet another daughter, he discards baby Bari, and she is raised outside the palace walls. Later in Bari’s life, the king becomes seriously ill, and out of filial duty the disowned princess descends into hell to bring back life-giving water to save her father. This water miraculously rejuvenates the deathly ill king.
Writing Tip
ⓐ or old fables → 삭제 중복되는 부분을 생략하여 간단히 표현.
ⓑ and human life → , including human life 논리적으로 모든 것에는 인간의 생명도 포함되므로 덧붙이는 and가 아닌 포함의 including이 적절.
ⓒ Such water appears → Water takes an important role 자연스러운 영어식 표현으로 수정.
ⓓ Korean traditional → the traditional Korean 형용사가 여러 개 올 때 더 객관적이고 뚜렷한 의미의 형용사가 명사 가까이 배치됨, ‘전통적인’보다는 ‘한국의’가 더 그러한 조건에 맞음.
현실 속에도 ‘기적의 물’로 불리는 생명수가 있다. 프랑스 루르드 지방의 성수(聖水)가 그중 으뜸으로 꼽힌다. 1858년 베르나데트라는 14세 소녀가 마사비엘 동굴에서 발견한 샘물이다. 천연 게르마늄 등이 풍부한 광천(鑛泉)이다. 1912년 노벨 의학상 수상자인 알렉시스 카렐 박사가 “루르드 샘물의 질병에 대한 치료효과가 있다”는 보고서를 낸 이후 더욱 유명해졌다. 샘물 입구엔 완치된 사람들이 두고 간 수많은 목발이 걸려 있다고 한다.
내가 한 영작
Life-giving water exists in reality as well. ⓐThe “Holy Water” in Lourdes, France, is regarded as the best. In 1858, a 14-year-old ⓑBernadette found the spring in the cave of Massabielle. The water from the spring is mineral water containing germanium. The spring water ⓒ became more famous after Alexis Carrel, the 1912 Nobel Prize winner, wrote ⓓ a report that the water from the spring in Lourdes had a healing effect on diseases. At the entrance of the spring hangs many crouches that people left behind after they got cured.
JoongAng Daily 에디터가 수정한 문장
Life-giving water exists in reality as well. The holy water of Lourdes, France, is renowned the world over. In 1858, 14-year-old Bernadette Soubirous found the spring in the cave of Massabielle. The young girl was later canonized as a saint. The spring water of Lourdes became more famous after Alexis Carrel, the 1912 Nobel Prize winner, wrote in a book of the water’s magical healing effect on his own ailment, as well as those of countless others.
Writing Tip
ⓐ The “Holy Water” in Lourdes, France, is regarded as the best. → The holy water of Lourdes, France, is renowned the world over. 단순하게 최고라고만 해서는 그 기준이 불분명.
ⓑ Bernadette → Bernadette Soubirous 공식적인 상황이고 처음 소개되는 이름이므로 성까지 포함하여 표기.
ⓒ 삽입 → of Lourdes 일반 광천수와 혼동이 될 수 있으므로 지역 명기.
ⓓ 삽입 → in 보고서를 뜻하는 report 뒤에 동격의 that절은 맞지 않음 보고서에서 that절의 내용을 썼다고 하는 것이 올바름.
with the Korea JoongAng Daily
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