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Botox, better vibes: Here's what Korea's divorcees are looking for in a partner

Published: 26 Jun. 2025, 18:56

Wedding dresses are displayed in the store front of a boutique in Seodaemun District, western Seoul, on Jan. 26, 2024. [NEWS1]

Chastity, pedigree and the dream of the “wise mother and good wife” are losing their grip on Korea’s remarriage market.

As divorcees seek a second chance at partnership, they are bringing far more pragmatic — and sometimes surprising — standards to the table.

OnlyYou, a remarriage agency, and Bien Aller, a matchmaking firm, jointly conducted a survey from June 16 to Sunday asking 516 divorced men and women about how their views on ideal spouse traits had changed since their first marriage.

Asked which traits they had emphasized in their first marriage but now view as less important, 32.6 percent of male respondents cited a "good homemaker." Academic credentials came next at 22.1 percent, followed by hometown at 17.4 percent and birth order among siblings at 13.9 percent.

Among women, 34.5 percent said education was no longer a key concern. Another 26.4 percent deprioritized birth order, while 16.3 percent pointed to family background and 14.7 percent to diligence.

When asked which factors gained importance the second time around, men ranked financial stability highest, with 31.4 percent choosing it.

Age difference followed at 25.2 percent, attitude toward remarriage at 20.9 percent, and empathy at 16.3 percent.

Of women, 30.6 percent chose physical appearance as their top consideration. Another 28.3 percent cited empathy, 21 percent chose age difference and 14.7 percent pointed to remarriage outlook.

A table is set with food for jesa, a memorial for ancestors that is commonly practiced in Korea. [GETTY IMAGES BANK]

Outdated norms

The survey also asked which traditional marriage standards participants now consider outdated.

Among men, 28.3 percent named virginity as irrelevant, followed by 25.2 percent who said they no longer avoided families with many daughters.

Another 19.3 percent dismissed concerns about partners who had lost parents early, and 15.9 percent rejected rigid family customs.

Women most frequently cited aversion to marrying an eldest son, with 30.6 percent calling it outdated. In-law dynamics followed at 27.5 percent, female-heavy families at 16.3 percent, and traditional rules at 13.6 percent.

Shifting social expectations

Son Dong-gyu, CEO of OnlyYou, said men once looked for stay-at-home partners but now prefer women who are active in society.

“In the past, a man’s education was seen as an indicator of future success. But now, people care more about actual assets than academic potential,” Son said.

Lee Kyung, chief coordinator at Bien Aller, added that many divorced men split half their assets in divorce settlements.

“Today, with dual income households being the norm, men often expect remarriage partners to contribute financially,” Lee said. “At the same time, women now consider not only economic power, but also a partner’s image, self-care and aesthetic sense.”

Translated from the JoongAng Ilbo using generative AI and edited by Korea JoongAng Daily staff.
BY CHO MUN-GYU [[email protected]]